Zakelj Diary Home Page: http://bbhhs96.dyndns.org/~zakeljdiary/

8/15/02

Life in the Refugee Camps

1946

By Anton Zakelj, translated and edited by John Zakelj

Tuesday, January 1, 1946 (in the Liechtenstein camp near Judenburg, Austria)

I awoke at 4 a.m., but didn't get out of bed till 6:30. At 7, I went to Mass. Bishop Rozman is predicting that we will all return home to Slovenia this year. Maybe! But I doubt it.

Cilka's brother-in-law Mire returned from Feldkirchen and Spittal with 10 shirts which he had obtained through bartering, and a sweater which he got for me for 70 Schillings. Clothes are still in very short supply, and many of us have only what we carried with us when we left Slovenia.

Mire says he heard that my youngest brother Janko returned home safely from Russia. Three years ago, while we were under German occupation, Janko was forced to join the German army and was sent with them to Russia. We were worried that he might never return.

Wednesday, January 2, 1946

The local newspaper reports that there are 60,000 - 70,000 Chetniks in Serbia who are preparing for a spring revolution against the communists. We don't know whether such reports are really true.

If we have to stay in the refugee camp for another six months, and if I can get a job, I will marry Cilka. She has become very impatient because I continue to delay our wedding plans. She is beginning to wonder if I really want to get married. But I tell her that it makes no sense to start a family when we have nothing.

Thursday, January 3, 1946

Our refugee camps are run by UNRRA, the United Nations Relief and Rehabilitation Administration. Today, UNRRA handed out new and used clothing, all American. Four of the men in our group go out into the woods to cut firewood. They were especially in need of some new clothing, and they each received a coat, overalls, a shirt and gloves.

Saturday, January 5, 1946

This morning it was 5F. I cut firewood for the kitchen all morning.

Tomorrow is the holy day of the Three Kings, also called the Epiphany. This evening, as we usually did back home on the evening of this holy day, we formed a procession around our barracks, sprinkled holy water and prayed all 15 decades of the rosary. (In Slovenia, we repeated this three times each year - on Christmas eve, New Year's eve, and on the eve of the Epiphany.)

Sunday, January 6, 1946

At 11 a.m., we went to a solemn high Mass in Judenburg. This afternoon, we watched people ice skating on the frozen Mura River.

Monday, January 7, 1946

I cut firewood for the kitchen all day.

In the afternoon, UNRRA gave me a new green overcoat and a pair of overalls. The overalls are so large, they're like a clown costume. My sister Mici got a blue coat that is too small for her, Mire got overalls, but Cilka didn't get anything.

Tuesday, January 8, 1946

Cilka wrote her first letter home since we left Slovenia. Mail service is finally becoming available again.

I helped my sister Mici exchange her coat for a larger one.

We hear that Chetniks murdered the mayor of our home town of Ziri. (This report turned out to be false.)

Wednesday, January 9, 1946

I helped another member of our group with a clothing exchange. Now almost all of us in our barracks are wearing the same green overcoats with huge collars and yellow trim on the left sleeve.

I made a list of other clothing needed by each member in our group. Many people are not pleased with what they received in this latest distribution. They think it wasn't done fairly. But we really needed new clothes. Some members of our group were so desperate, they had gone to Wolfsberg, where they got pieces of cloth from burned military uniforms. They sewed clothes for themselves out of those pieces.

There are no reports in the newspapers about what happened to Domobranec generals Rupnik, Nedi and Pavelic. We fear that the British have sent them back to be executed in Jugoslavia.

Thursday, January 10, 1946

About 100 Volksdeutscher arrived from Slovenia. (These are Germans who had settled in Slovenia during the war.) The authorities put them in new barracks in our camp.

We received new tobacco ration cards. We can buy 40 cigarettes for each card. I trade the cigarettes for money, food and other things that we need.

Sunday, January 13, 1946

It was warm today. Cilka and I walked in the nearby hills all afternoon. I gathered twigs which we will use to make baskets. The baskets will hold the "pillows" on which our women make bobbin lace.

Tuesday, January 15, 1946

A new snow turned everything white.

The price of bread has dropped from 31 Schillings per kilo to 15, but people have very little money. Here in the camp, we are getting decent rations for now. Each person is getting almost a pound of bread, about 2 cups of coffee, half a cup of milk, two cups of soup, about 3 oz. of meat, half a pound of potatoes and 2 cups of corn mash each day. But the corn mash is getting more watery each day.

Due to a shortage of electricity, the lights are turned off each evening form 7 - 8 p.m. When it's dark in our room, we usually say prayers. Somehow, Jakob shaves himself in the darkness.

I stayed in the barracks all day today. I started reading my first English book. It's called "The Oakleyites." I don't understand it - I don't have a good dictionary to look up words that I don't know.

Wednesday, January 16, 1946

Rozman, the tailor, agreed to make my sister Mici a new coat for 80 cigarettes.

Thursday, January 17, 1946

Today is my father's 67th birthday. I wonder how he is, back in Slovenia. This morning, I went to Mass. In the evening, I went to church to say the rosary. I usually don't go when it's this cold.

Our friend Potocnik returned from a trip to a different part of Austria, where he had talked with some people who had news from our home town. He said our neighbor died, our friend Johan got married and two families were sent into exile. People want to see an end to communist rule.

Saturday, January 19, 1946

Janko Demšar (one of the members of our group) left for Feldkirchen. I asked him to take my new overalls (the clown costume) and see what he could trade for them.

Sunday, January 20, 1946

This evening, we went to the nearby town of Murdorf to see and hear an excellent performance by the Ukrainian refugees. The performance included dancing, magic tricks and singing.

Groga (one of the members of our group) has been complaining that he doesn't get his fair share of food. I gave him our ration card and told him he could get his own food from the camp authorities. Up until now, we've been getting our food together and then dividing it up in our room. Now we have our first separatist!

Monday, January 21, 1946

Our woodcutters brought 2 cubic yards of wood from the forest today. On the way back, they somehow lost two large pieces. There was an argument because not everyone is doing their share of work

Tuesday, January 22, 1946

Janko returned from Feldkirchen. He got 500 cigarettes for two pairs of overalls and some other things. We will be able to trade the cigarettes for things we need here.

Wednesday, January 23, 1946

They've started cooking dry beans for supper. It's a good, but heavy food.

We weighed ourselves. Pavel Kokelj is the heaviest in the camp at 209 lbs, Cene is close behind him at 200. I'm far behind at 152.

Thursday, January 24, 1946

This morning, I chopped wood for the kitchen. In the afternoon, I did the same for our room, then I got things ready for basket weaving.

Friday, January 25, 1946

Mire left for Spittal - without permission from the authorities. He can't seem to find any work here in the camp. He lies in bed till 10 or 12, and then he eats and smokes. Sometimes, when things are not going well for him, he'll sleep for days.

Cilka is sometimes angry with me because I keep delaying our wedding. She would like us to start a family. How can we, when we have nothing and our future is so uncertain? Right now, the other refugees from our home village of Ziri are my family.

Saturday, January 26, 1946

This afternoon, I went to the city to sell the lace we had made, but I sold nothing. Money is short everywhere.

Our friends Karl and Janez Voncina got jobs with shoemaker Russheim nearby. They say they are satisfied.

Sunday, January 27, 1946

I went to Mass at 5 a.m. and 7 a.m., and litanies at 5 p.m. In the afternoon, Mici, Cilka and I walked into the city to watch skiers and ice-skaters.

The newspapers report constantly growing conflicts between the Americans and British on one side and the Soviet Union on the other side in a conference of foreign ministers in London. I expect we will see another world war starting during the coming year.

Monday, January 28, 1946

UNRRA is handing out clothes again. Cilka received a coat and towel.

Tuesday, January 29, 1946

Mire returned to the camp with flour, nails, suitcases and some other things which he obtained through bartering during his travels.

He also brought news from our home village:

Our church organist, Anton Jobst, together with his wife and child, were deported by the communist authorities in Ziri on Christmas Eve, 1945. All of their possessions were taken away. With great difficulty, they made their way through Hungary, to Celovec (Klagenfurt), in Austria. (A web page published in Ziri in 2001 states that the reasons for their deportation are still unknown. In the early years of the communist government in Jugoslavia, it was not unusual for people to be deported or jailed for vague "crimes against the state.")

Mire also reported that the Gantar brothers (Cilka's cousins) in Ziri were arrested and their possessions taken. Martinc was shot (we learned later that this report was not true), and Muhovc died. Shoemakers are working again at a number of small shops in Ziri.

This morning, UNRRA began vaccinating everyone against typhus. In the afternoon, they gave each of us a shirt. The shirts are all the same - gray with collars so large, they look like elephant ears.

Thursday, January 31, 1946

The British delivered enough wood to the camp for 20 new barracks, which will be built by the Ukrainians.

Friday, February 1, 1946

I sold 200 American cigarettes for 2 Schillings each and bought 2 kilos of bread for 12 Schillings each.

At Kuznik's, I got an order for us to make bobbin lace - that's good!

Saturday, February 2, 1946

This afternoon, Cilka and I walked across the frozen Mura River and then back through the town of Murdorf. We read a report in a newspaper about many priests being arrested in Ljubljana - my brother Stanko is among them.

Pavel Podobnik says he heard that refugee Lovro Mozina was shot when he returned to his home in Slovenia. (That report turned out to not be true.)

This evening, we had Slovenian pancakes for the first time in this camp. From 8 - 10 p.m., we played "spank the judge" ("biti rihtarja"). Janez Levicar, who was a real judge in Slovenia, got spanked the most. Whenever Levicar bent over and covered his head, we all crowded around him in a circle. Pavle, our largest and strongest man, jumped forward and spanked him, and then quickly jumped back behind the rest of us. Levicar looked up and could not guess who spanked him. Levicar got spanked more than anyone else before he finally guessed right.

Sunday, February 3, 1946

For Sunday dinner, we had a thick soup, and then for supper, we had beans. Finally, after months of being hungry, we have enough food!

This afternoon, the weather was nice. Cilka and I went for a walk in the woods, but we argued again.

Tuesday, February 5, 1946

I drew a nice design for a bobbin lace collar. It's for an order I received from a professor in a nearby town.

Wednesday, February 6, 1946

I received an order for more than 100 pieces of bobbin lace. This will provide enough work for my sister Mici, Cilka, and Karl Erznoznik's Mici for 6 months!

Thursday, February 7, 1946

At 6 a.m., we went to a Mass for my priest brother Stanko, who is in prison in Ljubljana.

Friday, February 8, 1946

The Ukrainians are building new barracks quickly, and tearing down some which we had built.

Sunday, February 10, 1946

This afternoon, Cilka and I walked across the frozen Mura to an auto junkyard. In the evening, our group played "spank the judge" again.

We hear that, at the London conference, the Americans and the British refused all Russian requests that refugees be forced back to their homelands.

Monday, February 11, 1946

Today was the second round of typhus vaccinations. I only got one shot today, some got two. The others say it hurts, but it doesn't bother me.

In the evening, we listened to a speech by Dr. Basaj about the dangers of selfishness and laziness. Back home, Dr. Basaj was a leader in the Slovenian government. Now, he's a refugee like the rest of us, but he still has the ability to inspire people.

Tuesday, February 12, 1946

This evening, Dr. Basaj spoke to the women. Outside, it's snowing and raining.

Wednesday, February 13, 1946

Last night, I dreamed about eating meat which was cooked in our family home. Here, we get very little meat.

This evening, I went to driver's training for the first time. A Ukrainian engineer is teaching in the city; he says he will begin teaching in the refugee camp.

Thursday, February 14, 1946

I paid 5 Schillings for a driver's training course which will be held in the new school barracks in the refugee camp. Sixty people signed up.

Saturday, February 16, 1946

I went to the city (Judenburg), where I sold all the lace I brought with me and got orders for more. Thank God!

Sunday, February 17, 1946

We went to Mass at 5 a.m. and 7 a.m. as usual. In the afternoon, Cilka and I took a walk along the Mura River to the woods and back. It was very windy!

In the evening, we had a pre-Lenten (Mardi Gras) dance in our room. Since we are almost all men in our room, we invited women from the nearby barracks to join us. Karl played the harmonica, Fr. Kopac played an aluminum banjo, Levicar played on a homemade tambourine, I played bass (on a broom), someone else played on a comb, and others played on the pots and pans that we had made from warplanes.

Monday, February 18, 1946

We hear news reports that the UN Security Council meeting in London ended without success. It appears that another world war is unavoidable!

I received written confirmation that I was vaccinated 4 times against typhoid.

Exactly one year ago, American planes bombed our home village of Ziri.

Thursday, February 21, 1946

I cut firewood for the kitchen all day. I'm tired because I'm no longer used to such hard work. I spent most of the previous 3 days drawing designs for bobbin lace.

The camp authorities have said that everyone will have to go work for farmers in the nearby countryside. Our driving instructor says students in the driving course will be exempt. People do not like working on the farms because they are forced to work 14 - 16 hours a day, and all they get is some food.

Saturday, February 23, 1946

Mire and Janko went to Kapfenberg, where they hoped to buy some Jugoslav dinars from recent refugees. They were only able to get 500 dinars for 75 Schillings. They will send the dinars back to their relatives in Slovenia.

Sunday, February 24, 1946

There was no dance tonight. Rev. Rott had a sermon this morning, in which he denounced the dance we had last week.

We have 7 priests in our camp:

1) Rev. Janez Klemencic was the pastor of his parish, a real farmer, and very hard working. He likes to do everything very quickly. When he does the final blessing at Mass, he's already turning and getting ready to take off his vestments. He's adamantly opposed to refugees having to work for local farmers for little or nothing. He has made contacts with the local clergy, who often help him with extra food and other things. Since he knows German well, he often helps in the nearby churches.

2) Rev. Roman Malavašic is the complete opposite of Rev. Klemencic. He doesn't venture into the surrounding area, and he suffers because of that. He works hard in the camp, publishes the camp newsletter "A Home on the Mura," takes care of the camp chapel and works with the boys. In his sermons, he tells us to not be too concerned about getting paid for our work, but then he always wants more donations for the chapel. How can we give for the chapel if we don't get paid for our work?

3) Rev. Josip Rott is a nice man, but he doesn't work and he wants everyone to live like a saint. He's opposed to all forms of recreation and is very strict about proper singing in church. Once, when he thought people were singing too lively in church, he stopped them in the middle of the song and told them there is only one church song that should be sung like a march.

4) Rev. Franc Kokelj is an older man who preaches about nothing other than the upcoming final judgement. He looks like the poorest man in the camp, but actually is the wealthiest. Why did he leave Slovenia?

5) Rev. Janko Hafner likes to split firewood and wants to excommunicate anyone who doesn't attend Mass regularly.

6) Rev. Joze Percic is the least known priest in the camp.

7) Kanonik Tomaz Klinar is a higher ranking priest, so he doesn't live in the barracks with the other refugees. He has an apartment in the special barracks for the camp administrators. He likes to play tarok cards. His sister cooks for him.

I know that Rev. Klemencic and Malavašic would be executed if they returned to Slovenia, but I don't know why the other priests left home.

Monday, February 25, 1946

Five members of our group (Štrajt, Rafel, Andrej, Janez and Groga) have decided they will return to Slovenia. I tried to talk them out of it, but I was not succesful. A couple others are thinking about returning, but can't decide. A sadness has fallen over our room, as if we just had a funeral.

I'm attending driver's training 4 evenings a week. In addition to the Ukrainian engineer, we have two other instructors - a Croatian named Rauš and Janko Smole.

Tuesday, February 26, 1946

One of the men who will be leaving has had a job cutting firewood for the camp. The job provided him with extra food rations. Cene at first suggested I could take his job, but then picked Franc Kopac. I wonder if he thinks I wouldn't work hard enough.

I worked on bobbin lace designs all day.

At 2 p.m., Štrajt, Rafael, Andrej and Janez left the camp to return to Slovenia. I cried, and Mici cried even more. We may never see each other again.

The Mlinar sisters came for a visit. They are working for farmers in the Koroška region of Austria.

Levicar is no longer disapproving of refugees who return to Slovenia. He's quiet and thinking. The other members of our group say it's crazy to think about returning. There is a feeling of envy for those who can return.

Wednesday, February 27, 1946

I went to the damaged warplanes in the woods and brought back some wire and aluminum pipes.

Thursday, February 28, 1946

This evening, some of the refugees performed the comedy "At the White Pony." My sister Mici helped people remember their lines. Attendance was good and people were happy with the performance.

Saturday, March 2, 1946

Tonight I went to a repeat performance of the "White Pony." The acting was excellent, especially Dr. Erman.

Sunday, March 3, 1946

At 7 a.m., I went to Mass, then driving class from 10 - 12, then a walk with Cilka from 3 - 5 p.m., and another dance from 8 - midnight. Even I tried dancing. But the absence of some members of our group (the ones who returned to Slovenia last week) kept our spirits down.

Monday, March 4, 1946

I wove a basket from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. I think it turned out well.

We have electricity now without interruption, and without any problems.

Tuesday, March 5, 1946, Mardi Gras

A new English class started at 5 p.m.. The teacher, Miss Russon, speaks English only and moves on very quickly. From 8 - 10 p.m., I went to driver training. The others in our room had a dance till midnight. There was also a dance in the camp hall with people wearing masks.

Our room got extra food for supper because it was our turn to get what was left over in the kettle. The food that is left in the kettle after everyone gets their rations goes to a different barracks each day. Our turn for this extra food comes up every other Tuesday.

Wednesday, March 6, 1946, Ash Wednesday

Someone set up a puppet man made of straw next to a barracks that has mostly women, and set it on fire. Everyone in the camp came to watch. Whoever set it up was teasing the women about not being married.

Thursday, March 7, 1946

Mire returned from another one of his trips. UNRRA is saying they will no longer give him food ration cards since he leaves without permission.

Friday, March 8, 1946

I was at driver's training all evening. The engineer spoke 4 times, and the electrician 3 times. We have to learn everything about how automobiles work.

Saturday, March 9, 1946

Mire got his first postcard from his wife Manica (Cilka's sister) back home in Ziri. She writes that she is fine, but bored. There is not a single word for Cilka. I think Cilka's family is angry with her, that she is traveling with me without being married. We should have gotten married in Vetrinje, our first camp. But I always wanted us to be married by my priest brother Stanko, in the presence of my parents, and my other brothers and sisters. Are we waiting in vain for the time when that will be possible?

Sunday, March 10, 1946

I went to Mass at 7 and 9 a.m., then to driver's training from 10 - 12, then for a walk with Cilka and Mici to the soccer field outside town. This afternoon, the camp had a farewell ceremony for departing UNRRA director Cluyver.

Cilka got a card from her sister Manica with news from Ziri. Her cousins Franc and Joze Gantar were each sentenced to 10 years in prison for not cooperating with the Partisans during the war. Franc was my boss when I was assistant manager for the shoemakers' cooperative in Kranj during the war. I said the two of us would probably be hung from the nearest lamppost if the Partisans win the war; he said we would probably get 10 years in prison. He guessed that one exactly right.

Later, I learned that Franc Gantar had actually helped the Partisans, even while we were making shoes under German occupation. One day during the war, he was very worried about a certain wagonload of wood. The horse-drawn wagon was stopped by Partisans, who took 800 kilos of leather which Franc had hidden under the wood. I believe he had arranged with the Partisans for them to get that leather. I heard that he also gave the Partisans 7% of whatever profit we made from sellling shoes to the Germans. That kind of assistance probably kept him from being executed after the war, but it wasn't enough to keep him out of prison. After he got out of prison, he worked his way up until he became one of the managers of the Alpina shoemaking factory, which was formed out of the many small shoemakers' cooperatives which we had in Ziri.

Monday, March 11, 1946

The international situation continues to become more and more dangerous. There are news reports that the Russians have occupied Persia. The British and the Americans are protesting, but the Russians are not bothering to reply. Last week, Winston Churchill attacked the Russians in a strongly worded speech. He proposed the formation of a British-American mutual defense alliance against the Russians. Many people expect war to break out very soon.

Wednesday, March 13, 1946

About 300 new refugees were settled into the new barracks in our camps. These are all Volksdeutcher - Germans who had settled in Jugoslavia during the war.

Friday, March 15, 1946

In driver's training, I've been studying automobile electrical systems.

In English class, I completed my biggest assignment yet - a letter to a cousin in Australia.

Monday, March 18, 1946

My brother Joze, who has been living in Feldkirchen, Austria, came here to visit us in the camp. He says he received letters from many members of our family back in Ziri: his wife Francka, daughter Anita, our brother Janko, and our parents. All letters are censored, so they cannot say anything that would be critical of the current situation in Slovenia. But since they are not asking us to come back home, that means we should continue to wait here.

Tuesday, March 19, 1946

We celebrated my brother Joze's 40th birthday. My sister Mici cooked some delicious dumplings, but Mire didn't want to eat any, since they were made out of his flour.

This afternoon, a group of us walked about 7 miles to Dietersdorf and back through Fohnsdorf. We hoped to visit some friends who had recently arrived at a camp in Dietersdorf, but the Croatians running the camp would not let us in.

In the evening, my roommates played "spank the judge," but I didn't join in.

Wednesday, March 20, 1946

All day, I cut firewood for the kitchen. This is usually Karl's job, but he was busy repairing shoes for Cilka and Mici. I got into an argument with Rode, who had sharpened the saw only on one side.

Thursday, March 21, 1946

Sugar is no longer included in our food rations. Again, there is talk that we will all have to go work in the nearby farms. Very few people are agreeing to go voluntarily.

Friday, March 22, 1946

Earlier, we were all required to deposit whatever money we had in the local banks. Now they refuse to let us withdraw any savings without approval from UNRRA police.

This afternoon, a group of us took a long walk past the ruins of the Liechtenstein castle to the top of a nearby hill.

Monday, March 25, 1946

Today was a holy day. We went to Mass at 7 and 9 a.m., then took another long walk in the nearby hills.

This evening, some of the refugees performed the play "Snow White."

Tuesday, March 26, 1946

Franc Kopac received a number of letters from Slovenia. Everyone is asking him to come back home, including some of his friends who had just recently returned home from refugee camps. Even so, he says he won't return.

Anze also got a letter with an invitation to return home. Cene got a letter, but no invitation. Groga has decided to return home, and is looking for the documents he will need.

In the news from Jugoslavia, General Mihajlovic and his staff were arrested. Many people were hoping he would bring freedom this spring.

Wednesday, March 27, 1946

Our friend Groga left the camp to return home.

Our food rations are being cut: 25% less bread, canned meat instead of fresh, no sugar, less milk. We've been getting 1,800 calories a day - now we'll get 1,200. (Nutrition experts recommend about 2,000 calories a day.)

Monday, April 1, 1946

UNRRA is moving all the new refugees who arrived in our camp two weeks ago to a different camp at Trofaiach. The people do not want to move.

Tuesday, April 2, 1946

Today's dinner had less bread, but more canned meat and potatoes. Instead of sugar, they gave us each two pieces of chocolate.

I wrote my first letter home.

Our driving instructor asked us lots of questions today. He tried both German and English, but none of us knew the answers.

Yesterday, Pavel Podobnik and Janko Demšar (two men in our group) decided to return home, but today they changed their minds and decided to wait a while longer.

Saturday, April 6, 1946

The authorities are requiring all refugees to report for work on nearby farms. I accompanied one of our men to the "Arbeitsamt" (work office) to get an exemption. A friendly clerk recommended that I go to the regional government and get approval for our people to work in trades and crafts (making lace, etc.). But I have to find merchants who are willing to buy what we produce and treat us like their workers.

This afternoon, we watched a soccer game. UNRRA staff played the British pilots, winning by 4:2.

Tuesday, April 9, 1946

Today we welcomed a new arrival to our camp - Joze Urbanc. Early in the war, Joze was a partisan, but then he became a Domobranec. When he was a Partisan, they called him "Gašper." In a battle between the Partisans and the Domobranci, the Domobranci captured him and convinced him to join their side. At first, the Domobranci didn't trust him, so they sent him into battle with the Partisans with only three cartridges for his rifle. But he soon proved to be an excellent fighter for the Domobranci.

After the war, Joze fled to Vetrinje with the rest of us, but the authorities sent him back to Yugoslavia with the other Domobranci. He escaped and twisted his ankle during the escape. With that twisted ankle, he fled on foot across the mountains. When he arrived in Austria, the authorities captured him and put him in prison for 6 months because he didn't have the proper authorization to enter Austria. (The rules became much stricter after we entered Austria.) Now the Austrians finally released him and allowed him to join us here. (But he only stayed with us for a few months until he got work near Celovec (Klagenfurt). Soon after he left, we received a letter for him from Fr. Erpic in Australia, inviting him to settle there. As I recall, we didn't have a forwarding address for him, and he may have never received that letter.)

Wednesday, April 10, 1946

Two of our roommates, the brothers Pavel and Jakob Podobnik, returned to Slovenia today. (Jakob is the one who made us a wall clock from an unexploded time bomb.) When he left Slovenia last year, Pavle promised his wife Maricka that he would return within two years. He's keeping his word, and even going back a year earlier than he promised. Pavle is feeling brave and ready to face whatever problems they will encounter. But his brother Jakob is very worried that the communist authorities will make life difficult for them.

Felix, one of our other roommates, became sick today and fell down. We had to carry him to the hospital.

Thursday, April 11, 1946

We didn't receive our usual ration of bread yesterday and today. Instead, they gave us each some dried biscuits.

I was at driver's training from 6 - 10 p.m. It was all lectures, some of which I didn't understand.

Saturday, April 13, 1946

Today our driver's training moved out of the classroom and outside, next to an automobile which is owned by the camp. We didn't actually drive, but I sat in the driver's seat for my first time.

Sunday, April 14, 1946

I drove a car for the first time - it was only a short distance with the instructor, and it didn't go well.

Monday, April 15, 1946

This morning, Rev. Hafner began a class in religion for men. I joined with 30 other men and boys.

Tuesday, April 16, 1946

Today, I was at religious education in the morning, then to an English class which is taught by Mr. Klemente, a fellow refugee, then to an English class which is taught by Miss Russon (a Canadian who is employed by UNRRA to help run the refugee camp), and then to driver's training. Six hours of classes!

Wednesday, April 17, 1946

I cut firewood all day.

Thursday, April 18, 1946

Today we had classes again. The religion class finished with Mass and communion.

Saturday, April 20, 1946

Tomorrow is Easter. We used some of our savings to buy traditional Slovenian Easter food - sausages, salami and eggs - food which we had not seen for months. The women baked some potica. This afternoon, we took everything to church to be blessed, and then we had a wonderful dinner.

Sunday, April 21, 1946, Easter

We went to the church in Judenburg for the 5 a.m. Mass of the Resurrection. The church was full, and the singing and music were beautiful. There was a short procession outside, and guns were fired into the air in celebration.

At 7 a.m., we went to a second Easter Mass at the camp chapel. Beautiful singing!

For Easter dinner, we had soup with dumplings, potatoes, fried chicken (!), lettuce and potica. What a change from our usual diet!

This evening, we played "spank the judge" in our room.

Monday, April 22, 1946

In driver's training today, I drove for about 5 - 6 minutes in the morning, and 10 minutes in the afternoon.

My brother Joze is visiting from Feldkirchen, Austria, where he has been living and working for a shoemaker. He is showing me how to cut leather to make the upper parts of shoes. He says he plans to return to Slovenia and wants me to get his job when he leaves.

We often still see new refugees arriving from Yugoslavia, and at the same time, some of the refugees who had left earlier are returning.

There was a dance in our room from 10 p.m. to midnight.

Thursday, April 25, 1946

I had my picture taken and paid 8 Schillings for 4 copies. I gave one to Cilka and will use the other copies for identification documents.

We hear that the driver's training class may be eliminated. I need 20 more minutes behind the wheel before I can take the exam. I haven't learned how to shift gears yet.

Friday, April 26, 1946

I visited a local shoemaker and sold him 3 pairs of leather uppers which I had cut out with training from my brother Joze. The shoemaker ordered 3 more pairs.

Saturday, April 27, 1946

Driver training class was out on the road today. I got to drive for 3 minutes - it went well. The camp's second car broke down. A piston broke through, ruining the engine.

Sunday, April 28, 1946

Our driver training class drove on a nice road almost to Leoben, about a 60 mile round trip. We stopped often, taking turns driving. I drove about 15 miles, including some backing up - it went well again.

Monday, April 29, 1946

This afternoon, I accompanied 8 fellow refugees in a car to St. Johan in Tauern (about 20 miles away) where they will work for farmers. The car was driven by a Russian, who drove about 50 miles per hour on the narrow, winding mountain road. The ride was horrible!

This evening, the UNRRA director announced that we will have elections for a health and welfare board for the camp. Board members will not be paid, and each one will have responsibility for a separate aspect of camp life, such as health, food, employment, schools, etc.

Tuesday, April 30, 1946

People are becoming excited about holding elections in the camp. Some people are saying I should run on a slate which will oppose the current appointed leadership.

About 160 Slovenians relocated to our camp from Dietersdorf, while a number of Croatians moved there. Now we have only Slovenians (about 700, including children) in our camp.

Wednesday, May 1, 1946

Cene Kokelj (one of my roommates) received about 20 pounds of wheat for working on a farm. I accompanied him to a nearby town to help him find a miller to grind the wheat into flour, but we couldn't find anyone.

People celebrated the first of May. It was hot outside.

Jerry Zupan tried to convince me to run on the opposition slate. I told him I would decide tomorrow.

Thursday, May 2, 1946

I found someone in a nearby town who was willing to give me 13 pounds of flour for about 18 pounds of Cene's wheat. Cene let me keep half of it for helping him.

I decided to run on a slate that would support the current camp leadership. I think the opposition just complains and criticizes, and can't agree what to do to make things better.

We had a camp meeting from 8:30 to 10:30 p.m. Some people asked me to run for president of the camp board, but I refused. I told them that I would run for a position on the board if I could have the responsibility for employment. I am particularly concerned about our teenagers, who loiter around the camp without any work.

Friday, May 3, 1946

Current members of the appointed camp leadership are not allowed to run in the election for the new board. The only person we can agree on for president on the "governing" slate is Dr. Erman, who has been in the appointed leadership. Dr. Erman has agreed to give up his appointed position, which has now been filled by his wife.

Some of the individuals who were considering running on the opposition slate changed their minds at the last minute and switched to the "governing" slate.

Saturday, May 4, 1946

Cilka's brother-in-law, Mire, is campaigning against Dr. Erman and some of the other members of the "governing" slate. Levicar and Šepin are working hard to build support for the "governing" slate.

Two of the 8 men and women whom I had accompanied last week to work on farms returned today. One of them is the man whom I had asked to speak for the others, and to keep on eye on how the farmers treated each one. He said the farmers made them sleep where their dogs usually slept - under the front steps. They fed them left over grain which included more mouse droppings than grain. These farmers still think they can treat us the way Hitler told them to treat the Slavic peoples who were forced to work on German and Austrian farms during the war.

Sunday, May 5, 1946

The election campaign has been very lively, but I decided to stay in my room today. The opposition published 6 - 8 leaflets, but we didn't publish a single one. I didn't even campaign in my own room. Each person has to make their own decision!

The elections were held this morning, until noon. I went towards the close, and voted for the other candidates on my slate, but not for myself. I don't think anyone can judge their own qualifications. I don't know whether any of my roommates voted for me.

Results were announced at 3:30: There were 350 people voting out of a possible 390. Ivan Macek received the most votes (340), and he will be responsible for food and kitchen. Joze Tominc received 298 votes to be in charge of health. I was third, with 278 votes to be responsible for employment. Other members of the "governing" slate were successful in their bids to be in charge of culture, education, athletics, gardening, clothing and firewood. The opposition slate was not successful. Jerry Zupan received 134 votes, the most for anyone on the opposition slate. Dr. Est, who expected to be elected president, received the lowest number of votes on the "governing" slate.

The UNRRA director told us today that we will be getting less food for a while. He begged us all to stay calm and maintain order for at least another 2 months - until the locally grown food begins to be available this summer. Each day now, the camp gives us some bread, a little meat, some potatoes, peas or macaroni, but it hardly adds up to half the calories we should be getting. We are receiving about 750 calories a day, and they tell us it might drop to 320. We supplement the camp rations with the potatoes that we found left over in farmer's fields last fall. Sometimes we eat those potatoes three times a day, prepared in many different ways, but we have no butter or fat to mix with them, so they're not very filling.

This evening we had a dance and played spank the judge in our room till 10 p.m.

Monday, May 6, 1946

The camp board held its first meeting this morning, first just the board for 30 minutes, then a 2 hour meeting with the UNRRA director, Mr. Gilbert (a Belgian military officer employed by the United Nations Relief and Rehabilitation Administration and in charge of 3 refugee camps in the Judenburg area). We will be meeting every Monday morning. Because our board president does not understand German, I was selected to represent our camp.

The director explained the responsibilities of each board member. I will be responsible for arranging employment. The director asked me to meet with him individually tomorrow morning.

Employment is the area that I wanted to work on. I will do everything I can to get jobs for our refugees, especially the young people. I don't like to see our people loafing around the camp, but I don't like to see them being treated like slaves by the local farmers either.

At our first meeting today, I proposed that we select someone to take minutes of our meetings. Nobody volunteered, so I agreed to do that. (Later, the director asked for minutes each time we met, so I was glad I was able to provide that. I wrote my notes in Slovenian during each meeting. The director wanted an English translation, so I worked on that after each meeting. The translation went well, except I had a hard time finding the right English words for "meeting minutes." At first, I couldn't believe that "minutes" could be the right word. In Slovenian, the word "minuta" means a minute of time and has nothing to do with meeting notes. But then I learned that, in Latin, "minutiae" means "details.")

(During the entire time that I was responsible for employment at the camp, I always checked the working conditions before I sent anyone to a particular job. There were many jobs available where the conditions were horrible and the pay was very minimal. There were no minimum wage laws. The best jobs were with the British in Zeltweg or in the woods near Schmelz.)

(Although my responsibility for refugee employment took a lot of time, I never received any pay. Later, they provided each board member with 15 cigarettes a week, but that didn't last long. For a while, we also got some extra soup which was full of mouse droppings. As I write these additional notes thirty years later, I can't believe I was able to eat that soup. I must have been very hungry.)

Mire bought me a Remington typewriter which is very useful now for my new responsibilities. I can type in both German and English.

On one of his many trips to neighboring towns and cities, Mire traded some shoes we had made for 4 lbs. of bacon, 20 lbs. of wheat, 3 lbs. of flour and a quart of milk. This will be a very welcome addition to our camp rations!

Tuesday, May 7, 1946

At 6:30 a.m., I went to Mass for my priest brother Stanko, who is still in prison in Slovenia. It's his birthday today. We prayed for his release.

Then, I met with the UNRRA director and a Croatian who is responsible for employment at the Dietersdorf camp. The director provided us with additional instructions about our new responsibilities. He said we can each choose one or two assistants. Then we went to the local Austrian "Arbeitsamt" (work office).

This afternoon, I met with a representative from a construction company in Graz regarding possible employment for our refugees. Janko Demšar will go visit them tomorrow to review the working conditions.

Wednesday, May 8, 1946

This afternoon, we had a special 3-hour meeting of the new camp board. Dr. Erman wants to dictate everything, and everyone else stays silent. I made some proposals, but it didn't do any good.

Thursday, May 9, 1946

Last January, everyone had to turn in their German Marks. Each person received 150 Austrian Schillings in return; anything over that had to be deposited in the Postal Savings. Today, I went to UNRRA with a list showing how much each person in our room turned in. We are having problems getting any money back out of savings. While I was there, UNRRA gave me 5 pencils and some paper for my new responsibilities.

This afternoon, Mire and I went to a quarry near Maria Buch regarding employment possibilities. We talked with a worker who told us that the pay is not very good and the work is physically very demanding. Workers need to be well fed, not the kind of diet we get at the camp. Work in the quarry is also hard on the workers' clothes, so you need to be prepared for torn and worn out clothes that will need to be replaced frequently.

The worker at the quarry showed us a valuable stone (onyx) which they sometimes find in that quarry. He also showed us where they mine mica, which is used for windows in stoves and furnaces. Mica comes in thin, flat pieces which look like glass but are more heat resistant than glass.

This evening, we had a meeting of the leaders from each barracks. We agreed to a plan to establish workshops in the camp.

It's now one year since we became refugees.

Monday, May 13, 1946

At 5 a.m., the British surrounded the camp. At 7 a.m., they asked everyone to come out of their barracks. Every male older than 15 had to show their identification. We were very worried that they were looking for people who may have been reported as "war criminals" by the Yugoslav government. But nobody was arrested.

For the rest of the morning, I typed a card file with information on every person in our camp who is older than 15 and younger than 60 - about 350 people. I am dividing them into 3 categories: 18 - 45 year olds who are unemployed (we have 80 in this group), 16 - 60 year olds who are employed (140 in this group), and 16 - 60 year olds who are not able to work (150 in this group).

The camp board met from 7:30 to 9:30 p.m.

Wednesday, May 15, 1946

I received my first postcard from Yugoslavia - it was from my mother. My sister Mici also received a card from our sister Julka, and Cilka received a card from her friend. They report that they have bread, but not enough butter, sugar or money.

Thursday, May 16, 1946

This evening, the camp board reviewed the way I had categorized everyone in the employment file. One person attacked me because I had listed his wife as being able to work, but not working. Everyone else agreed with my list and my plans.

Saturday, May 18, 1946

My brother Joze arrived from Feldkirchen with flour, bacon and other food.

In the evening, we went to a circus performance, but it was not very good.

Sunday, May 19, 1946

This morning, I met with refugees who want to work as lumbermen in the woods.

In the evening, I worked on a list of craftspeople in our camp. We have shoemakers, carpenters, bakers and others.

Monday, May 20, 1946

All morning, I ran to various places in Judenburg asking about employment for our refugees, but found nothing.

Last Saturday, I was able to withdraw some money from Postal Savings for 4 of my roommates. There was a limit of 150 Schillings per person. Today I went back with a request for 8 people, but the Postal Savings wouldn't release any funds.

90 Serbs moved to our camp from Dietersdorf.

Wednesday, May 22, 1946

UNRRA is providing some clothes for refugees who are working. We're being told that everyone else will have to wait until fall, when we will need clothes for winter.

This evening, Franc Zupan directed a concert of Slovenian singing in the camp hall.

Thursday, May 23, 1946

The camp kitchen is providing us with pea soup in the mornings and pea soup in the evenings. We also get a little bread, meat and potatoes. We've been supplementing that with the potatoes we found left over in farmers' fields last fall, but now our room has only about 20 pounds of those potatoes left. What will do when we finish the last of those?